If a child is struggling to breathe, is floppy or will not wake, or their skin, lips or tongue look blue or grey: call 999 now. Colour changes are harder to see on brown and black skin, so check the palms, soles, lips and tongue. If you are worried but it is not an emergency, call NHS 111. In Northern Ireland use your GP out-of-hours service.

MarionSleep help for families

Ways to help your child sleep

Settling methods, each with the steps, what the evidence really shows, and who it may not suit. None of this is compulsory.

These are choices, not instructions

With the exception of the safer-sleep rules, nothing on this page is a medical necessity. A bedtime routine, gradual retreat, controlled crying, bedtime fading: these are all things parents may decide to do, or decide not to do. Cerebra, whose free sleep guide is one of the best UK resources for parents, puts it plainly: "Choose whatever works for you, your child and your family." The Sleep Charity says much the same: do what feels right for you and your baby, and be confident in your decisions.

So every method here gets the same even-handed treatment, including the popular ones that are thinly evidenced and the one many parents find unbearable. A parent who reads all of this and changes nothing has not failed at anything. The only rules on this site that are rules are the safer-sleep rules, and they have their own page.

In this section

A bedtime routine

The foundation, and the only approach that is universally recommended.

Responsive settling and gradual retreat

Staying with your child and withdrawing slowly, including the chair method.

Controlled crying

Presented neutrally: what it does, what it does not do, and why many parents decline.

Other approaches

Pick-up-put-down, camping out, bedtime fading and the dream feed.

The sleep diary

The tool that underpins all of it, and how long to give a change.

Where this comes from

  • NHS, Helping your baby to sleep, the bedtime routine sequence and the note on excitement before bed.
  • The Sleep Charity, Bedtime routines, the timed routine, "consistency is key" and the two-week rule.
  • NHS Lothian, Graduated withdrawal (PDF), the six stages, the pacing and the "boring parent" instruction.
  • East London NHS Foundation Trust, Sleep Basics (PDF), the camping out protocol including "start where you are", and the warning about abandoning a technique halfway.
  • Cerebra, Sleep: A Guide for Parents (PDF, version 4, October 2025), "choose whatever works for you", the controlled crying and bedtime fading protocols, the contraindications, the autism routine change, the sleep diary columns and "this is normal, keep going".
  • Newcastle Hospitals NHS Foundation Trust, sleep information for parents of babies aged 0 to 12 months: responsive settling, and falling asleep during a feed or while held.
  • Mindell et al. 2009, Sleep 32(5):599-606, the randomised trial of bedtime routines in 405 mothers.
  • Mindell and Williamson 2018, the dose-dependent pattern across 10,085 children.
  • Mindell et al. 2006, the American Academy of Sleep Medicine review: 52 studies, the 82 per cent average improvement, the classification of methods, and the comparisons finding no difference in long-term efficacy.
  • Hiscock and Wake 2002, BMJ, and Hiscock et al. 2007: the controlled comforting and camping out trials, and the loss of significance at four months.
  • Meta-analysis of behavioural sleep interventions, Scientific Reports 2022, 10 randomised trials, including the outcomes that were not significant.
  • Price et al. 2012, Pediatrics 130(4):643-651, the five-year follow-up of 326 children finding no marked long-lasting effects, positive or negative.
  • Gradisar et al. 2016, Pediatrics 137(6), 43 infants, cortisol and attachment at 12 months.
  • Douglas and Hill 2013, systematic review, the case against intervention under six months.
  • BASIS, Sleep training, the critique of the evidence base and the Middlemiss cortisol finding.
  • UNICEF UK Baby Friendly, their stated position that controlled crying is not recommended.
  • Trial report, 26 of 91 families discontinuing or not completing.
  • Pinilla and Birch 1993, Pediatrics, the 26-parent focal feed study.
  • Scope, Keeping a sleep diary, the practical tips and why memory is unreliable when you are sleep deprived.
  • Sleep Action, Scotland, gentle strategies without cry-it-out methods.

Last checked 1 August 2026. This page is general information, not medical advice. If you are worried about your child, speak to your health visitor or GP.